3 Ways to Manage Worry

I’m a lifelong worrier. As a kid, I’d lay awake at night worrying if I’d forgotten to do any homework. I spent one Christmas Eve begging my parents to leave a party because I was worried Santa would miss our house. And those were just my minor childhood concerns.

I’d sometimes lose sleep worrying my family would die in a tragic accident. And after my dad passed away from cancer in 1997, I felt my years of worrying about my family were justified. I gave myself permission to keep worrying because I was “preparing for the worst.”

I hid behind the notion that worrying motivated me, and it did to a point. Terrified I’d spend my retirement years eating cat food, I started saving as soon as possible. You could say I was just being responsible, but the action was driven by fear, not logic.

But the problem with worrying is it rarely solves a problem. Negative and cyclical thinking won’t generate a solution – usually, it just breeds more worry. If you’ve ever found yourself asking “what if,” you’ve probably realized later that worrying about something that might happen (but probably won’t) is a waste of energy.

Constant worrying exacerbates depression. Anxiety leads to more worry; you hope you’ll relieve a miserable feeling by finding a solution, but when that inevitably doesn’t work, you move on to another worry and the cycle continues.

3 Ways to Manage Worry

Actively managing worry is a useful way to limit the amount of time spent fruitlessly fretting. By taking the following steps, you can teach yourself to control worrying and prevent it from taking over your life. When a worry appears, the goal is to redirect your attention back to what you’re doing (working, reading a book, eating a meal, saving for retirement etc.) and tell yourself to think about your concerns during “worry time.”

Here are three ways to dial back the worrying.

Choose a dedicated time and space for worrying: Excessive worrying can impact every aspect of your life, from sleeping to your job.

Choose a convenient time each day to schedule time to worry, say 30 minutes after work. As worries pop up through the day, remind yourself you’ll address it during your “worry time.” This allows you to refocus your attention on the task you’re currently involved with. If you’re overcome with worry, experts recommend scheduling “worry breaks.” These are short intervals throughout the day, such as five minutes every hour.

Track your progress: Keeping track of your ability to delay worry and your anxiety levels provides valuable insight into the changes you experience on the days you’re able to delay your worries.

The table below is one way to track your progress. It’s easiest to rate your effectiveness in delaying worry and anxiety level using a 1-10 scale.

	Worry Time	How Effective Was I at Delaying Worry?	Percentage of Day I Felt Worried	Overall Anxiety Level
Sunday
Monday
Tuesday
Wednesday
Thursday
Friday
Saturday

Keep a list of worries: If your “worry time” isn’t until the end of the day, you may forget about something that crossed your mind in the morning. While that may sound like relief, the concern is likely to appear eventually. Nip it in the bud; you don’t want to suppress these thoughts. Write down worries that crop up through the day so you can face them (and accept them) during the designated time.

No one is immune to worrying, but for some, it prevents us from experiencing life in the present. It’s not easy to manage worry, but with enough practice, you’ll spend less time in an unhealthy thinking pattern.